I... I just want to be found. I'm tired of this existing. I want to live. Please find me, help me, guide me... Push if you have to. Don't let me standstill anymore.
Just finished watching Watchmen Complete motion comix.
12 episodes, 12 chapters of story about the world.
I never thought that it will capture me this way. But, it felt as if i was sitting on some lecture. I don't know why.
Talks about maddnes, greater scheme of things, death and life. Sanity and faith.
The story is complicated. It makes you think about things that don't bother anyone that often. But, what is more important is... I think i'm not so childish as i thought - i understood this tale. It brought that knowledge with it. Knowledge, that takes your breath away. I haven't watched the movie yet, so i can't compare but i know i wouldn't care if it's different. I've seen the "original" so i don't even need to compare. Right now all i can do is place my thought into words, and leave it - locked away, so it wouldn't bother me this way. Maybe, i overcome my own stubbornes when it comes to accepting something as new. Or maybe i had this thoughts before. Or could it be that i am "evil" as i allways said? Don't know, and i doubt that it matters. I'm no god to judge some people for their mistakes. I'm no law, nor justice. Could be that there is no Me as well. But that just locked away thought, nothing to see. Nothing to think about. And for some reason it's in english.
Life matters. No matter what others say. But... Death matters as well. And when we trying to make them clash each other - who do you think remains? True to be said - there is no answer. Maybe someone somewhere someday find it.
It's like a question "what came first - the chicken or the egg?"
A possibility itself. An egg, that can turned into anything by it's will.
A weilder of power of creation of possibility - the chicken.
I realised it know. Suddenly. But as i said i'm locking it away.
Could it be that both are right? Or wrong?
People who beleive in God, would probably choose the chicken.
People who beleive in Science would probably choose the egg.

Doesn't matter. Why they said that bless is in indifference? Could it be that this answer will make entire universe collapse?
Who knows...

No matter how you look at it - you don't need a "Greater being" to change your life. But it doesn't meant that there is none, and that it won't help you.
Well... I'm closing it now. Things in the wolrd, greater scheme, all that doesn't require attention, and all that does. Changes, depending on the person. But there is one thing that unites us all...


That is what brought our ancestores out of the sea. That what made God made us. That what created this Universe. That what's ruining the world. That what could save it. Strongest, probably, essence in the wolrd.
Let it brought happines, accomplsihment in the life. Make dreams come true, so they won't harm anyone. Not spill blood of our soul.
Let our soul gain chance to communicate with our mind... Guide us.

I'm still lost... Still wants to be saved. But i know that's not enough... I want to be happy. Want not to be alone. Want power.
And i will achive it.

Journal of me. May 7th, 2009.

@темы: Watchmen, Я