I... I just want to be found. I'm tired of this existing. I want to live. Please find me, help me, guide me... Push if you have to. Don't let me standstill anymore.
It's like looking into abyss, never looking away. And unless abyss likes you, it's really scary. Especially if you were born with sight.
It's not the same as when you closing your eyes. Nothing like that. It is as if your vision is sucked into black vortex.
I felt fear, i felt fear when i realised that it was my eye inside of the glass. That i, myself tore it out of the socket, snapping.... Wha? A micro chip/contact? Even this did not brought me to senses.
Because when i closed my right eye, in faint hope that my left is still where it belongs, i could see only abyss. At that very moment a rush of fear has flushed thru me.
In the back of my mind i kept hoping that i can somehow put it back, and it would fit and i could see with it again.
Still - i guess it was a nightmare rather than a dream.
Fear was a little dull, but he was. And it's been awhile.

As for life outside of my dreams, everything is the same. Which is bad.
Sure on To Do list is to find a job, and start doing some deep research on study matter in my UNI, so i could return and restart my education.
Also, once those lasy asses will begin study courses of englsih language i may finally get to the point where i won't have any trouble to write word Believe. Or to point that i would know what past-present means XD

One the seemingly plus side is that i somewhat made a new friend over game via Skype, and that thanks to WoW i actually had a schedule, which kept me in check until my time ran out. Lately, due some unknown factors i had a terrilbe vertigo. That i thought were to repeat every day.
Also i had rather scary relevaltion, as i realised that i wanna clean up my room.
Tho in a matter it's yet again a simple relocation of items. Like always =)

Oh and i almost forgot. I actually moved into a room. Which means either i would have to share it with any guest(s) *wicked smile* that requires large personal space (like someone i know, i think) or move myself into hallway again. Of course i could always sleep on the floor. XD

Also, i suck at construction measurement. I can't place items "on eye". But apparently i'm able to whoop some simple wiring. Haven't forgotten those yet.
I'm saying it cuz mother required buying lamps for flowers in the hallway. Which i bought, brought, wired, and placed on the wall.
Now everynight i see a bright violet light shining thru the door =)

Aaand i watch that Kick-ass movie. Which lost a lot in translation. But i wasn't expecting it to be very good. Still it was decent.